things we need

I have recently learned that there are certain things we need as adult women. Some of the most important of these are: a great bottle of nail polish, the perfect box of hair color, and friends who will tell you the truth especially when you are wrong. These are definitely not in the order of importance. But I have been learning that advice is often very hard to take, but when it comes from someone who cares about you- it is palatable and not very offensive. This is a very new concept to me. I have spent a lifetime fighting the authority figure and attacking those who correct me. It is incredibly freeing.

Dealing with a Mom as a Mom

I have always thought I had a good relationship with my Mom. But recently, I have seen a very manipulative side of her. Where it concerns my children- her grandchildren- she seems to want to be in control of the situation. She has tried to take over my role of caring for my sons where Doctors and services is concerned. I believe it is because she is fearful that they will not get what they need. Unfortunately, this reflects on me that I am not sufficient to provide the perfect care for my children. She has also offered financial advice. The result has been me feeling like she treated me like a 12 year old.
Well, I had a very difficult conversation with her recently where I was very respectful but was also able to let her know how I felt. I'm not saying it was a conversation without tears or yelling on my part- it was difficult. I think I kept saying over and over again, "Mom, I'm not 12, I'm 42. I have gotten really good at asking for help. I promise to ask if I need your help." There was also an issue of her feeling out of the loop with regards to these issues. I again assured her that I do let her know anything anyone official had already told me. I also let her know that I was not going to report to her every time a friend gave me an idea which might help.
I felt great and awful when I got off of the phone with her. Great because I was able to get rid of the feeling that I had to report anything that was happening with the boys to her. Awful because it really went against the people-pleaser in me. But I will get on with my life, and she will get on with hers. I am an amazing Mom to 2 kids who happen to have different needs. I almost wrote "Special Education kids", but they are really kids who have different issues than a lot of others although most of their needs are the same. I take great care of them and my husband and at 42, I can handle most of what is thrown at me with Jesus' help.

Words from a cartoon character

OK- so my youngest son is so upbeat- it is sometimes like I'm living with a cartoon character.
Here are some of the things he had to say recently:
(While waiting for his older brother to meet us at the Middle school) My 9 year old says,"Mom- that girl there- she's hot!"
"She is? Oh, look she's practicing a cheer with her friend."
"Wait they are cheerleaders?"
"Yes."
"Well then they are hot!"
"Why is that?"
"Cheerleaders are hot, Mom!"
"And where did you glean this specific wisdom from?" (as I chuckle quietly)
"I don't know- but they are. Everyone knows that!"

I blame it on too much Disney Channel but it was a very interesting conversation to have had with my 9 year old- that's for sure!

First trip to The Olive Garden Restaurant (a step up from Applebee's) and my youngest was very impressed with the bread sticks, salad, and pizza. Here's what happened:
"Mom, the Chef made this food delicious!"
"You should tell the waitress to let the chef know."(this coming from Dad.)
So the waitress comes by and he had to repeat twice but got his point across. "Please tell the Chef that this food is delicious!"
She agreed to tell him.
Five minutes later- the head chef comes to visit our table.
"I hear you think the pizza is good? My friend (can't remember the chef's name) made it for you. I'll tell him you liked it"
"Thank you it is delicious!"
"Well, make sure you finish it all!"
My son felt very special!